Judge Dredd

Title: Judge Dredd

Year: 1995

Got It For: $4.80

Going into the 1995, uh, “summer blockbuster” Judge Dredd, I pretty much knew what I was getting into. Comic book adaptation, Slyvester Stallone vehicle, and an infamously cheesy movie. Hell, this film’s alternate title may well have been “1001 Kooky Faces of Armand Assante.”

The premise of this classic? A few hundred years in the future society has collapsed…and then risen…and is in the midst of a collapse…again…I think. Anyway, the streets are patrolled by Judges, brave men and women who don red plastic armour and ride large unweildy plastic motorcycles through the middle of soccer riots in the name of justice. Judge Joseph Dredd, played by Stallone, is one of the senior members of the force and looked up to by cadets and fellow Judges alike. After giving a lecture to his adoring pupils on the importance of upholding the law, Dredd is framed for the murder of a journalist by his former best friend, who has plans for taking over the city that include rock’em sock’em robots.

 

Dredd is tried and given a life sentence, at least five years of which apparently must be spent with Rob Schneider. Talk about cruel and unusual punishment. Their transport is shot down by cannibals however, and soon Stallone is teaming up with Schneider’s 1337 haxxor, murdering other Judges and causing massive collateral damage and casualties throughout the city, all in the name of JUSTICE AND LAW!

While the acting in this movie is incredibly cheesy and the DVD has a weird issue with aspect ratio on my TV, it’s worth the $4.80. I got a few good chuckles out of it and the effects are somewhat impressive for the time. The costumes are ridiculous and the characters over-the-top, but sometimes that’s what makes a movie enjoyable. I say pick it up if you find it somewhere on a lonely shelf in the depths of your local video provider.

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